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(Evan Pinkus/Giants) Evan Pinkus/NY GIANTS 49 / 255 QB Jaxson Dart (6) Evan Pinkus/New York Giants 50 / 255 QB Jaxson Dart (6) makes a pass during an NFL preseason football game against the New England Patriots on Thursday, August 21, 2025 at Metlife Stadium in New Jersey

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I've had just enough chicken tenders That I am talkative But not enough That I am reckless And then Fenton slams his hands on the table And goes One more for the table Bring em over Denise Let's do it And then Fenton goes You know our credentials Sort of Kind of Strong word but yep We have ridden the roller coaster In the Estraland amusement park Off the track Into enemy territory Thrilling We have challenged the hot meat boys To a race down the serpent slide For the highest stakes of all A season's pass To the water park A worthy endeavor We have ripped Through the chocolate factory Covered in lights Being pursued by unearthly horrors Oh that Ah Very good Very good We have One King and Queen of the world One King and Queen of the Sadie Hawkins dance At the light depot Okay We have sentientized and unleashed A stream of giant pigs Upon the mall and beyond Very cool We have taken the jackets of the wild nogs And we have ruined their factory Amazing And we have permanently maimed the fudgies All right Understood you children have done much in your favor Understood you children have done much in your favor Understood you children have done much in your favor And you're young young Incredibly short reckless lives Thank you And all of this is to say What What are your credentials Adric How do we know we can trust you to handle your shit Tell us a tale of your misdeeds My misdeeds That highlights your motivations What makes you think you can't trust me children That tone That shifty look Maybe all the sneaky sneaky Maybe all the sneaky sneaky Activities you've been up to before we met you This secret handwriting Franklin pulls out his cryptic notes He darkens a little bit You've been going through my notes Yeah What of it You must understand children I've lived for nigh on these Boy 131 years And the life of an adventurer such as myself Demands a degree of caution You must understand I must Hold my trust close to my chest But To be frank You're but children I have no reason not to trust you What harm could come to me The harm rests solely upon you And also When you're in a foxhole with someone You're not the only one who's in trouble You're the only one who's in trouble When you're in a foxhole with someone You gotta know that you can trust them And also I'll be frank Linstein I love it I love it You know what that pushed me over the edge What do you want to know Here's your papers Thank you Don't do that again Okay Frank Alright so you want to know a tale Do you want to hear a story Is that what it is We want to know what drove you to the chocolate factory And why you are so desperate to get in there And find the Dairy Queen It can't be the money No Well yes But additionally We've spoken Magic is a dangerous thing And ever since the wizards left this world They have left nothing but ruin and danger in their wake And breakfast And breakfast And I am but one individual It would seem who is willing to take the threat Of Rampant Magical Destruction Seriously And so this chocolate factory poises an opportunity to do so Did Aedric start the menders Oh my god And so I have come to this place in an attempt to ensure that no harm will come to any who wander into potential threats presented by this location What do you intend to do Whatever I am able So Aedric started the menders We're all jumping to conclusions here I want to say that I'm writing it down Conclusion jump to That is my goal If I am able to make a coin or two here or there By performing some task or deed in the name of a financier Then so be it I require food and drink and lodging And the occasional karaoke night Oh nothing I am able to make a coin or two here or there And so be it I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks I give the snacks my children and the wizards in their ire, in their arrogance and their dismissal of these people, poked holes, tore, pulled at threads, and I seek to mend those holes

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